The Corrupt A Wish Game

[Raven]

It doesn't hurt at all! Mainly because you're paralysed from the neck down so you can't feel it.

I wish someone would trade me the Pokémon I want. D':

[Borg12345]

Granted, you get the pokemon but it dies of a horrifyingly painful and slow disease.

I wish my week hadn't been spent fixing a broken PC.

[Raven]

It wasn't. Instead you spent the week at the bottom of the sea because the Mafia sent you to sleep with the fishies.

I wish I could stop getting distracted and procrastinating and finally get my room clean!

[Borg12345]

Wow! Not only did you clean your room, you got mine done too! Cheers!

I wish that I could think of a funny wish.

[Raven]

You think of a brilliantly hilarious wish... unfortunately no one gets the joke and you just feel silly.

I wish everyone was compelled to follow my orders and were completely happy about it. >D

[Borg12345]

Granted, with all the love and happiness in the world! We're so happy to serve you, me especially so! I serve with unthinking joy and obedience, and in fact I'm so happy I drew you a pretty picture. IN BLOOD! SUCH HAPPY BLOOD! But do you know who's it is? Would you like to?

Why it's mine! ALL MIIIIINE!

<big><big>SO HAPPY&#33;</big></big>

*ahem*

I wish I had all of my blood back. Creepy cult like blood drawings do take it out of you somewhat.

[Coolpikaaa]

You get all your blood back. Huh.

<small>Wait, Isn't something bad suppose-
</small>
I wish to see Borg's drawing&#33;

<small>Oh.</small>

[Raven]

Turns out Borg has a viscous parasite in his blood and draining it for the picture saved his life. Unfortunately, that parasite latched onto your eyeball with it's fangs when you look at the picture. Suck to be you.

I wish I was a sociopath.

[Swix]

You're a sociopath. You manipulate others around you to such an extent that you form your own cult dedicated to the worship of you.

Unfortunately the Vatican disapproves of someone else usurping their monopoly on such things and you end up locked in the forbidden catacombs. Oh dear.

I wish this cold would go away.

[Borg12345]

Granted, but due to a technical error, the rest of your head vanishes too. Sorry.

No refunds.

I wish I didn't have to sleep. Ever. So much time wasted...